Sunday, November 22, 2009

MOVE OVER STEPFORD WIVES!

In case you haven't listened to our show, it is time to realize that I am an equal opportunity offender.
I do not discriminate and and I not a man hater, I am an evil hater.
So you pretty little women giving me high five for calling the weak little men out, stand back because now it's your turn...
:-)
As I mentioned in my previous blog, I am not blaming men for controlling the current power structure. We women are just as guilty for allowing this to happen. Not only that, how many of us have succumbed to this false position of power or authority and not only facilitated it, but encouraged it?
Look, before you you say, "I didn't do that, it's not my fault" I would like for you to clearly look in the mirror.
I am not too proud to admit that I myself took place in that matrix. I bowed down to false authority, based on fear and ignorance, lack of confidence, sense of self and education.
I played the whole game. I spent the 3 hours in the mirror each day trying to make myself pretty enough to be seen in public, worried about every little hair I felt had to be in it's proper place, buying the latest fashions because the magazine, billboards or industry I was in demanded it.
Yup, I actually thought that was what life was all about...
Women, make sure you're pretty (and shallow) so that you can get a man to marry you and rescue you from yourself, you little damsel in distress...

Of course after you are lucky enough to attract a shallow man in lust with the fake persona you were able to dust on with a makeup brush, chemical products and stilettos, you found he only wanted you for your body.......well DUH!!! How much time did you spend on your heart and mind in your beauty routine? Beauty is only skin deep.
So you battle it out, blame him for using you as a toy, feel worse about yourself then perhaps even trap a man with pregnancy, thinking that would be your key to locking a man.
Well, that didn't work, so let's dress up like a whore and go prancing around town in hopes to find a drunk man that will love how I look...for tonight.
What does this tell men about women? And I'm just touching the tip of the iceberg here.
You bought the lying media about what life is supposed to be about. You bought the fact that you need a man to save you. You bought the Hollywood movies portraying women as worthless little sex toys who would do anything to keep a man, then you complain about the results of you mirroring this disgusting behavior.
Blame the male, right? They are all weak, they are all shallow, they are all out for themselves...
Come on ladies! We need to look at our role in this situation!
You act like a slut, dress like a slut and bring another man home every other night for a temporary boost of confidence, then get mad that they treat you like a slut. If it walks like a duck, talk likes a duck, it is a duck! Why is it that we women refuse to accept that?

We often settle for less because of our own insecurities and inability to look within for power and truth. We handed our authority over because we were taught if you did not have a man that you were less than. Yes, maybe men have said it, but YOU BELIEVED IT!
YOU LIVED IT! YOU FOLLOWED THE SAME PATTERNS THAT NOT ONLY DEGRADED YOU AND OTHER WOMEN, ALSO MEN!
What are these men supposed to think when we are the ones that turned ourselves in to this piece of meat/trophy or stepford wives?
Would you like a man that thought all he had to do is look good to get a woman or love?

So, now you have the man, the kids, the house.....you sign up at the country club or gym and spend hours each day on your beauty routine or work out, while your nanny takes care of the children you gave birth to, then you send them to public or private school, giving up your authority to the establishment, trusting they know what's best for your children, or perhaps you are just too lazy to deal with the responsibilities it takes to raise them properly. Many of you don't even show up in the classroom to check on your children and see what they are or not learning because you are too busy driving around in your SUV or spending your husbands paycheck on frivolous fashions to keep up with the Jones. You have a purse full of colorful pills to create whatever mood you want because you are too weak to face the truth. You cover it up with drugs and alcohol. You've made anxiety, depression and bipolar fashionable and glamorous...
You are not home cooking good quality and healthful meals for your family, tending to the chores and responsibilities of keeping a good household. You are dining out, eating junk food or buying TV dinners which of course is contributing to all the dis-ease going around today due to lack of nutrition. You took them to their wellcheck appointments, instead of weighing and measuring your own child, poisoned them with vaccines even though you had no idea what was in them and gave them sugar every time they cried or asked for it.
When the children are home, you plop them in front of the boob tube, the back up babysitter and hand them some video games to keep them out of your hair so you can tend to your own selfish desires. If the children act up, you take them to a doctor for a psychotropic drug instead of taking a look at how you are contributing to this so called abnormal behavior. Then you sit around with the rest of the stepford wives complaining about what an awful life you have because you bought the lie that your children had a mental illness and use them as your token conversation to prove how strong you are for being able to put up with all you created.
Ladies, I want to ask you, how do you feel when you are ignored? Do you think perhaps you would act out somewhat too? These are children and they are YOUR responsibility!
Did you consider that before you brought them into this world?

Maybe some of you are in abusive relationships and are of the belief that you don't deserve anything better. And maybe that's true, at the time, due to your choices, but did you know you can turn that around? You make excuses like, "the children need a father", "I'm too stupid or too weak to raise them on my own", "I need his money to feed my children"....whatever the excuse may be. So you stay in a destructive abusive relationship and cower in your own SELF IMPOSED FEAR that you are weak and you need a man. Not to mention the fact that you are instilling this dysfuntional behavior in your children only to be repeated over and over rather than take part in breaking the cycle. This of course leads to what? More abusive relationships, physical and mental issues, which of course lead to more hate and fear. You think you despise what someone else did to you, when ultimately you despise yourself.

Yeah, I know that mirror doesn't look so good sometimes and truth is not always an easy pill to swallow, but you MUST if you expect anyone to respect you! You must respect yourself first!

Yes, we covered the existing power structure and it is fact that it has always been led my males, but really, is it their fault?
Wouldn't it be fair and truthful to assess ourselves and how we have contributed to this imbalance?

I received many emails yesterday about my blog, mostly good, I must say and I thank you all for your contributions and sharing your beliefs. I believe this is a topic that needs to be addressed, but are we ready to look in the mirror?

I happen to love the proverbial mirror, not because I like looking at myself, but because I do not like to stagnate. I am a full time student of life and prefer to work towards improvement. Denial will get you exactly what you've always had...nothing. You've been down that road...isn't it time to change it up if you are hoping for better results?

Some of the feedback pointed out the weaknesses and horror stories of women and for those who have experienced this type of abuse, I am truly sorry. Just as some men make men look bad, some woman also make women look bad. And you know what, just as I said yesterday...MOST PEOPLE ARE TO BLAME! MOST WOMEN AND MOST MEN!
The only way to fix the problem is to face it.

You women out there wasting your whole life away on bagging a man, whoring around, cheating, selling out for a paycheck or those with the entitlement mentality are doing all woman an injustice! Not only that, your children! The wellfare women popping out more babies for more government handouts....well, I have addressed you on my show, but to reiterate, YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF!

If it will make those I offended in my post about men feel better, I will share some of my stories about women with you...
I shared with you some insight to my upbringing and the male influence, what you may not be aware if is I have a mother too! :-)
Would it shock you if I told you how much she was to blame for the existence we lived?
She not only chose the path, but insisted that it was for the better. She discouraged me from ever speaking my mind or butting heads with authority. She didn't teach me I had any worth, only that to have a good life, we must do what men tell us to do. "Women should be seen and not heard" was her favorite line. In fact, all the times I was beat up or raped, she blamed me! She said I deserved it because it must have been something I said. "You are not to challenge men," she would say, "shut up and smile."
She believed that if only I shut up and married a man for money that life would be great and I would have everything there is to live for. Another good one she used to say is, "Never marry for love, marry for money."
Wow, that seemed really dark, but hey, she's my mother, she must be leading me in the right direction...
Although I knew something was wrong, I couldn't put a finger on it, after all, I only knew what I was taught. Men are smarter and stronger and woman and stupid, quiet and pretty and must compromise our own ideals to please a man.
How shallow is that? In fact she actually took part in coming after me for them men I ran away from because of their abuse. Yup, she honestly thought she was doing the right thing by doing her part in keeping my life controlled.
I remember before my marriage, I told her I really didn't want to marry him. Her response was, "Well, you can always get a divorce...at least he will have to help you financially."

Now I have to honest with you about that. I personally believe that if you make a commitment you keep it. Unless it's extreme conditions, abuse or influences, you stay married...after all, you made that promise. Love is a decision, not a temporary feeling and sometimes that means it isn't easy. Getting a divorce was not something I would have ever done on my own volition, so I am thankful that my husband left me, because I would have continued to justify the abuse to maintain the status quo. After all, I didn't deserve any better, I made my bed. Which is true, but that doesn't mean it is concrete.

WE HAVE THE POWER TO CREATE OUR OWN EXISTENCE! We don't have to sell out, give in or tolerate any abuse! EVER!!!
Why do we do this to ourselves? So is it the men we attract that are abusing us or is it a reflection of how we feel about ourselves?
We believed we didn't deserve any better, and we had a lot at stake in the false reality. After all, we were the ones that brought it on ultimately with OUR OWN BEHAVIOR!

Remember the ducks? Quack quack! Now it's time to do something about it!

Do you want to be loved by a real man? Well it's time to learn what love is and what a man is. A man is not solely attracted by your charm and physical beauty. Plastic tits look like toys. If you don't want to be a toy, stop acting like a toy or pumping up your body with silicone.
Consider putting the same time (or even more) into your emotional and spiritual beauty than your face or clothes. Get back in the kitchen. Yup, I said that. And it is your (one of your) place(s) in the home. Accept that!
I'm not saying you need to be barefoot and pregnant and that a man can't be in the kitchen in fact many men are magical in the kitchen, but if you want a man to take care of you, you must take care of him too and every REAL woman knows the way to reach a mans heart is through his stomach, Not his dick!
If you seek to attract the lust of his member, do not expect that to last. If you use sex as a tool to get a man, you are equally to blame for being treated like a whore. Don't be mad at him for not showing you the respect you can't show yourself by spreading yourself around in this manner. You are giving part of your soul to each person you engage in this act with. Think about that and how thin you want to spread yourself.

It's no wonder we are all screwed up these days. Everything we thought we knew about ourselves, the opposite sex, love, power were totally backwards! The issues have been perverted in the media, yet we continue to accept that as reality or go to some other "expert" to tell us how to be ourselves...LOL Think of the irony of that! WE ASK SOMEONE ELSE HOW TO BE OURSELVES? What do they know about you? They know you are human and that you NEED the approval of others in this existence, based on the current power structure. How about looking inward and cleaning out our false ideals, purifying our soul and practicing self discipline? Mastery of the self is the key to freedom. Know thyself and to thine own self be true. You are your own authority. You do not need to rely on anyone else to fix yourself or to make you free.

Truth is freedom! Time to not just talk the talk, but walk the walk. A REAL woman questions authority and teaches her children they should do the same. You know how to think for yourself and don't NEED anyone else's approval. You teach your children how to think for themselves and honor your husband, and yourself.

Stop treating yourself like less than and watch your reality change around you. It is time to get real...

And a little treat for those who think I am coming from a self righteous standpoint, please start pointing your fingers now.
I was one of these women. I was the stepford wife, I stayed with the mobster king pin...after all, I thought my children needed a father...and you thought I was just picking on you... ;-)

Been there, done that, now let's do something different!

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Great writing. Well balanced and beautifully done blueprint of doing it as right as possible.

xoxoxo,

Casey

Heterogeneous said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Very perceptive and well written as usual Christie.

We all must take responsibility for ourselves no matter who or what we think we are. Its the only way to have good lives together.

John